Pet Forum / Miscellaneous / Animal Health / May 2006

HOWEDY ilja2k,

You mean thanks for the DISINFORMATION the lyin dog
abusing mental cases who told you to take your dog to the
vet?

Naaah. That's SHEER IDIOCY. Your dog AIN'T SICK,
he's STRESSED from poor nutrition and mishandling.

WELCOME To The Freakin Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard's 100%
CONSISTENTLY NEARLY INSTANTLY SUCCESSFUL FREE WWW Wits'
End Dog Training Method Forums.

I'm Jerry Howe, The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{) ; ~ )  >

Here's your own FREE COPY of The Freakin Simply Amazing Puppy
Wizard's 100% CONSISTENTLY NEARLY INSTANTLY SUCCESSFUL FREE
WWW Wits' End Dog Training Method Manual <{) : ~ }  >

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Here's HOWE The Freakin Simply Amazing  Puppy Wizard feeds his dogs:

            Breakfast At The Puppy Wizard's -
                  Chez du Chien -
                 Gourmet Recipies

HOWEDY People,

Unbeknownst to yourselves, this has been a difficult
couple weeks for Your Puppy Wizard. Not to complain,
but he's been necessarily temporarily abandoned by
his Mrs.Puppy Wizard who had to attend to affairs out
of town for nine days.

Left alone, helpless and hapless to cope with domestic
and personal needs, to fend for HISSELF and his pups by
his own devices, his Mrs. Puppy Wizard HOWEver, is
considerate and foresighted enough to prepare His table
before him, in advance, and even calls to remind him to
breath, when necessary.

Your Puppy Wizard requires little from the physical realm,
existing primarily on prahana and nirvana as his staple diet.
HOWEver, his puppies unfortunately cannot thrive in the
physical world without the grounding effects of the evils
of wholesome food.

Mrs. Puppy Wizard prepares daily, fresh, well balanced
HOWES cooked meals. When Mrs. Puppy Wizard travels
occasionally, she prepares for the days of lean in advance,
by freezing two weeks worth of puppy chow and posting the
culinary instructions on the Puppy Wizard's coffee can, the
only physical need The Puppy Wizard requires, beyond his
internet connection and of course, his Mrs. Puppy Wizard
and puppies. But those are givens, naturally.

Mrs. Puppy Wizard prepares 2 meals a day. The
following recipe is for about a 100 pound dog:

Breakfast is half pound raw ground turkey, green
Source, and 1gram vitamin C, 200mg Omega 3 fish
oil and a *Iams cookie *(cause she LIKES to).

Dinner is 2 cups cooked rice, a tablespoon of rolled
oats and an ounce of hamburg. When the rice and oats
cool, add half cup pinto or similar beans, ground fine
in the food processor with equal amounts raw collard or
similar greens or your dog's favorite vegetable or cabbage,
a tablespoon or two Olive or Cannola oil, half clove garlic,
mixed with 1/2 pound raw ground turkey, a good vitamin /
mineral supplement (Green Source for People), calcium and
magnesium, 1 gram vitamin C, 200mg Omega 3 fish oil.

Addition of table scraps is encouraged, bear in mind
salt can be dangerous. The Puppy Wizard's diet is
environmentally friendly and will not produce noxiHOWES
gasses provided the vegetable and beans are ground
finely and because the Green Source contains digestive
enzmyes. Chicken necks are an EXXXCELLENT source of
thyroid hormones.

Of curse, that's just a BASIC guide. You may add fish
(canned mackrel is cheap and EXXXCELLENT) or chitlins,
liver or anything not too high in salt or preservatives.

               BHOWEN APETITE!